Secondly, there’s an old saying that essentially states that when a person shows you who they are believe them/take them at their word. The man isn’t lying to you or anything like that and you should have a clear sense of what his expectations are…

That being said, you need to ask yourself a question. Is this something you can tolerate? He said himself that he wasn’t likely to change, so the ball is essentially in your court. You need to decide is this the type of man that you need to be with and will respect your wishes and feelings. Obviously I don’t know this man and he very well may have a lot of other things going for him, but you need to ask yourself whether or not this kind of thing is a deal breaker.

Finally, I have one question… In today’s society and considering the state of the economy, what is wrong with a “less traditional man” asking you to help with the cost of a vacation or other things.

I have always believed in treating women with the utmost respect and as equals, but there is another side to that idea that many women (not all) don’t seem to understand. Being treated a an equal means that we should share the burden (financially speaking) equally, does it not? I’m not saying that a man shouldn’t treat his lady to dinner, but what’s honestly wrong with going half on a dinner or with a woman treating her man to a meal every now and then? How is that an insult? When it comes to dating and relationships there are always going to be trade-offs.

In a more traditional relationship, a man may be willing to be the bread-winner in some cases, pay the bills and prefer that his wife be at home or something to that effect, but when that happens and he is the one earning the money, he’s going to have ALOT more say in how it is spent, not to mention likely have certain expectations when he gets home as well.

Make no mistake, I am not being hypocritical in this situation because if a woman were the primary bread-winner, then I would expect her to have more say with regards to financial matters as well, but you are going to ultimately have to decide what is more important to you…

My answer, more so now than before, is “no.” Notice that nothing is mentioned of the husband submitting to the wife. But the larger issue is this: why speak of “submission” at all?

Ephesians 5:21-28:
21) And further, submit to one another out of reverence for Christ.

22) For wives, this means submit to your husbands as to the Lord. 23) For a husband is the head of his wife as Christ is the head of the church. … 24) As the church submits to Christ, so you wives should submit to your husbands in everything.

25) For husbands, this means love your wives, just as Christ loved the church. He gave up his life for her…. 28) In the same way, husbands ought to love their wives as they love their own bodies. For a man who loves his wife actually shows love for himself.

Colossians 3:18-19
18) Wives, submit to your husbands, as is fitting for those who belong to the Lord. 19) Husbands, love your wives and never treat them harshly.

The appropriate terms are, perhaps, “conversation,” “sacrifice,” and “commitment.” If the bible teaches otherwise, then so much the worse for Christianity.

Nonetheless, the fact that your guy is still having frequent “boy’s weekends” suggests that he is not ready for marraige anyway. People get married to “settle down”, which means leaving that lifestyle behind. Any good husband not only understands that, but wants it too. Further, it is issue within itself that your guy does not want you in the same city where he is – because it provides indication that he is probably behaving inappropriately and does not want to get caught. That should be a deal-breaker for you.

Many blessings in what you decide to do.

I actually don’t think his issue is about respect. It’s more about his insecurities as a man or just plain ignorance. There are a lot of RED flags in your relationship that you should not ignore.

I am a christian woman and I believe in the same scriptures your boy friend does however, he’s applying scripture that should be applied to MARRIAGE and not a dating situation. I’ve always been a believer that if my HUSBAND is doing the things that he should be doing, being submissive/obedient to his wishes will come naturally, but more importantly easily. So if you’re ONLY dating and bumping heads on so many important principles, such as freedom…You should definitely take heed to your personal concerns and issues with this man.

I commend you in standing your ground and if he walks away…I’m sure, no positive. It’s a blessing in disguise.

Good Luck Mama!